my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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