I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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