I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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