Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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