You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize