Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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