woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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