so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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