My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize