so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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