There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I think your dad took our porno
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize