I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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