Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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