let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize