the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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