we have officially lost it.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
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You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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