there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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