I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize