Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
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But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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