Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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