i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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