Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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