Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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