suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
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