Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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