At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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