4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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