Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
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He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
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sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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