After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize