literally had 100 drinks last night.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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