Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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