I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize