i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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