My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize