Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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