it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
The uberlube is also flammable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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