I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize