remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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