I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize