i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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