Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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