I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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