I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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