Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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