Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize