Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
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Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
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Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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