Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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