it hurts more in the daytime
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize