i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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