she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
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Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
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You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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